5 Amazing facts about babywearing

I’m so glad to have Eva writing this post about babywearing! She’s educated and passionate about this topic and what mom doesn’t need two free hands?! Whether you’re a seasoned or new mom, she has some great information for you below.

Babywearing is all the rage! Over the last couple of years, we have seen more and more parents, grandparents, and caregivers lugging little ones around on their front and back. This wasn’t the case in the 80s or 90s. So, what happened for babywearing to become so popular? And is it as beneficial as all its fans claim it to be?

The rise of babywearing correlated with a change in parenting styles and the introduction of social media. The latter helped to spread the word and made it widely acceptable. More and more research was done on the subject and plenty of benefits were found for babies and their caregivers. There are so many that you could fill books and books with them (which has been done) but let’s just look at these five.

5 Amazing Facts ABOUT Babywearing:

1.   Babywearing Helps with Bonding

Bonding with your newborn should be a no-brainer. It is your child, so it’s easy, right?!? No. It is not. Not at all! Bonding often needs a lot of work and might be quite challenging. Babywearing can be one of the tools to get you closer to your little one while encouraging connection, the release of oxytocin (the hormone that helps with the development of attachment), and to help with breastfeeding (for those moms who want to breastfeed).

2.   You Get a Workout In

A mother’s body changes significantly during pregnancy. We grow, nurture, and in the end, birth a little human being. What an amazing thing to be able to do! However, it also brings challenges we often don’t feel so comfortable with: a weak core, loss of muscle mass, and changes in body composition. Babywearing gives you a wonderful chance to tackle all of this and regain stability, balance, and strength. You get a workout in, even if you are just walking around the neighborhood. The added weight of your baby gives your body that little bit of an extra challenge it needs. As the baby grows slowly and steadily, if you are wearing your little one on a regular basis (on walks and during workouts), your body has time to adjust at a sensible pace. 

3.   Healthy for Baby

The health benefits of babywearing are massive for your precious little one! The closeness to your body helps her/him regulate their breathing, calms down their heart rate (to a safe level) and it stabilizes their body temperature. During winter your body temperature helps to keep your little one warm and in summer your sweat will help cool the baby off.

Babies are usually very content in carriers and tend to cry less. This means their stress levels are down, and as a result, this often leads to them falling asleep. They just feel comfy cuddled up so close to you and will give you a very nice, long break. Sounds good, doesn’t it!?!

And to top this off, carriers keep nasty germs at bay. A lot of people seem to think a baby in a stroller is an invitation to touch, kiss, or even take them out without the permission of their parents. Your baby being attached to your body in the carrier adds another layer of privacy, as touchy invaders would have to enter your close personal space. This helps immensely to keep people at a comfortable distance. That’s a nice little add-on, especially during the cold season.

4.   Makes Life Easier for Parents

Having baby in a carrier gives you TWO free hands and a bit of freedom! Having both of your hands free makes life just a tad easier. You can do things around the house, run errands in a much faster way, and use your phone without inventing ingenious ways of holding and typing with just one hand - the list goes on and on!

Babywearing also means that the baby is attached to your body in a back-friendly way as long as it is done correctly. Many of us parents suffer from back pain because we let the baby sit on our hip and we often tend to use just one side (no judgment: we’re all human!). This creates imbalances and contributes to those tight muscles which are the main cause of back pain in parents who have young children. Wearing your little one helps avoid this uncomfortable habit and eases the pain.

And if you have older children, babywearing will help you interact with your other kids. Oftentimes one parent is alone with two or more kids and that means multitasking at a very intense level. If your smallest one is having a cranky day and just doesn't want to wait on the floor, putting her/him in a carrier while caring for everybody else makes life not just a tad but a whole lot easier.

5.   You Can Go Everywhere

Imagine this: you are somewhat healed after giving birth and ready for your first outing with your baby. Your plan is to take her/him to a park or that beautiful forest area for a short stroll. You get everything ready, pack the car, stuff that massive stroller in there, and then … There is gravel on the path in the park and the trail in the forest is nowhere near a smooth concrete walkway. No chance to take a walk because it’s just not safe for a fragile newborn’s neck (or even an older baby’s neck!) to be rattled over such a surface without a good suspension and air-filled tires. So you put all of your stuff, including the baby, back in the car and head home again. Yes, been there, done that!

Now imagine all of that with a carrier. First, you still need tons of stuff: babies are tiny but, holy smokes, their equipment isn’t. Anyway, you don’t need someone to lift the stroller in and out of the car because a carrier is very lightweight and can easily be stored in a diaper bag. And second, you don’t need to worry about having an expensive, newborn-approved jogging stroller that would be able to transport your little one over almost every terrain (might be something for later, though - nothing against strollers, they have their place!). Your feet will take you and baby to all places and you can go pretty much everywhere. 

Those 5 Amazing Facts about Babywearing make it pretty clear why it has gained such popularity over the last 20 years. The benefits for your babies, and for you as their caregiver, are massive and can play an important role in your parenting journey.

Babywearing Safety Tips

Has all of this convinced you to give babywearing a try? Awesome, that’s wonderful news! Babywearing is very easy and convenient when done safely. Let’s take a look at a few points you should consider before going on your first walk with your little one in her/his carrier:

• Learn which carrier works best for you and your baby. You can own more than one carrier and can use them according to your situation, your baby’s needs, and the seasons.

• Check the manufacturer's instructions on how to use your chosen carrier safely.

• Remember the T.I.C.K.S rules.

• Understand at which stage baby can face in, out, or be on your back.

• Familiarize yourself with hip-safe wearing.

• Talk to your health care provider if your body is ready for babywearing.

• Ask yourself if you feel ready to wear your baby - mentally and physically.

Catch up with eva here:

www.pelvicandcore.com

Facebook: @pelvicandcore

Instagram: @pelvicandcorecoaching

Car Seat Safety with Secure-A-Seat

This guest blog is written by Sarah Fogarty, Mama and Owner of Secure-A-Seat in Knoxville!

Have you ever stopped to think about the amount of time you spend in your car? Drop the oldest off at school, rush over to a toddler gym class, take your youngest back to the doctor for yet another suspected ear infection, and pick up a few groceries just in time to get back in the car rider line for pickup.  There’s a lot going on in your head between focusing on the road, passing back snacks, and remembering all that you have to do that day and the days coming.

As moms we are in charge of a lot of the remembering/reminding (at least in my house), but because car seats are used day in and day out, over and over again, we often forget those need ongoing attention too. Nearly 4 in 5 car seats have errors in installation/errors and those statistics don’t seem to differ between new parents and experienced parents. Our local baby store has 43 infant seats, 59 convertible seats, and 40 combination/booster seats available for order. That’s 142 different car seats that have different installation instructions and varying rules regarding recline, support cushions, and weight limits. Considering you may have multiple children in different car seats, how do we go about remembering which car seats needs what and when?!?

The answer…. Schedule an appointment with Secure-A-Seat.

My oldest excited after we learned lots from Mrs. Sarah!

I’m a child passenger safety technician specifically geared towards providing you individualized and thorough education surrounding each seat!

With children, it can be difficult to find the time to attend a car seat event, but with Secure-A-Seat the service comes to you. I’ve found that caregivers can be more attentive and retain the information provided when they are in a familiar environment like their home where they know their children can safely play indoors or outdoors. The kids are only needed for a short period of time to test fit them in their car seats and waiting around the vehicle in an unfamiliar environment can be difficult for them to maintain patience, and therefore difficult for a parent to maintain attention.  

Each person has a specific learning style, and our appointments cover all of those. At the beginning of a car seat installation assistance appointment, I document how each seat is currently installed then review each error found with the caregiver by pointing it out visually and discussing what makes it an error. We will make all corrections needed together!

At the end of the appointment I’ll review the form for the errors we discussed and corrected as well as provide an easy to store rack card in your glove box with the most important information for YOUR car seat including its expiration date, lower anchor weight limit, height and weight limits for the seat, directions for crotch buckle placement, removal of cushions, and special/unusual requirements for your seat. This is something no one else does and it takes extra time before your appointment, but I do it because I am dedicated to you and I want to reduce future errors and improve understanding of your car seat!

Car seat installation help is the most common service I provide, but I also offer services that help you determine which car seat is best BEFORE purchasing. Because is there anything worse than purchasing a $300 car seat to get to our appointment and realize that it is not compatible with your other car seats or vehicle?!? More vehicles are now equipped with non-removal headrests which can create a gap between the car seat and vehicle seat, which is often prohibited by the car seat manufacture. Working together from the beginning can save you money in the long run! 

Book an appointment today to review your current seats or to prepare for new baby’s arrival, and let’s work together to get all of Knoxville and the surrounding areas riding safer! 

Y’ALL.

I thought I had the momming thing down after 5 years of this gig, but after chatting with Sarah and her doing her thing - my car seats needed help! I’m so glad she was able to tell me what to fix and how to fix it in order to keep my kiddos safe. I’m so grateful for her passion and knowledge. I highly recommend reaching out to her to make sure your car seat install is 100% correct! You can check out my post about my experience here.

Sarah’s contact information

Website: https://www.secure-a-seat.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/secure_a_seat/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SecureASeat

Email: secureAseat.knoxville@gmail.com

Comparing the Belly Bandit® Postpartum Luxe Belly Wrap and the Bellefit Postpartum Corset

This is a guest post by Marjorie Bohorquez for Bellefit. I have personally used their products postpartum with both of my children & can vouch for them as well!

Postpartum girdles and corsets offer many benefits to new mothers. The compression and structure of the girdle support the lower back and the abdominal muscles. And a great fitting postpartum corset can also help reduce swelling and increase mobility.

What Are the Benefits of a Postpartum Girdle?

After giving birth, your body begins a journey to recovery. During pregnancy, the muscles, organs, and tissues move to accommodate your growing baby bump. Your body releases hormones during pregnancy to relax your joints, and those hormones can remain in your system for some time after birth. In addition, a postpartum wrap or girdle can support a weakened abdominal wall, including cases of diastasis recti. And both women and doctors report that a wrap or girdle can help promote C-section healing, increase mobility, and reduce pain and soreness for many women.

But not all postpartum wraps, girdles, and corsets are made alike. In addition, there are many brands to choose from, so it can be challenging to find the product that offers all the features you need. Let’s take a closer look at the pros and cons of the Belly Bandit® Postpartum Luxe Belly Wrap and the Bellefit Postpartum Corset.

The Belly Bandit Postpartum Luxe Belly Wrap

The Postpartum Luxe Belly Wrap pros include:

●      Two color options: black and beige

●      Two torso length options: regular/tall and petite

●      High-backed to minimize back bulge

●      Beneficial for both C-section and natural birth mamas

However, the Belly Bandit Wrap has some crucial shortcomings, such as:

●      No pelvic floor support

●      Uses Velcro®, which can wear out with repeated use and appear bulky under your clothes

●      Can slide up or down over time and with activity

●      Pricey!

●      Lacks the structure and support of a corset

Many women believe a wrap is simpler because they want something easy to put on. Unfortunately, there are some significant differences between wraps and corsets or girdles. And they may not realize that some girdles and corsets are not only more comfortable to wear but they deliver benefits that a wrap simply cannot offer. Let’s look at the differences.

The Difference Between a Wrap and a Corset

Many hospitals, doctors, and insurers provide new mothers with postpartum wraps. In addition, many companies offer a wide variety of wrap styles. But a wrap and a postpartum corset are not the same garments. The wraps you get from your healthcare provider are often made of elastic and Velcro, and while they provide some support, they are usually not very durable. Often, the support is minimal, and new mamas struggle to get them to fit comfortably. And while many companies sell sturdier and better-fitting wraps, many new mothers are still disappointed with the fit and durability over time.

Wrap vs. Girdle

Postpartum girdles and corsets are designed to deliver unwavering abdominal and lower back support and are usually constructed to support the crotch and bottom. This garment style can offer much better compression and is less likely to shift as you become more mobile. And because of the structural design, the girdle can provide a high compression level with flexible and breathable materials. And you also won’t have to fuss with Velcro, which is noisy to adjust and breaks down more every time you rip it apart.

Now that we’ve examined the differences between postpartum wraps and corsets, let’s look at the pros of the Bellefit Postpartum Corset.

The Bellefit Postpartum Corset

The Bellefit Postpartum Corset offers an incredible array of features, including:

●      Medical-grade material and construction

●      Pelvic floor support

●      Stay-in-place fit and construction

●      Great for both C-section and natural births

●      A wider range of sizes than other brands’ wraps and girdles

●      Comfortable enough to wear all day

●      Made with hypoallergenic, breathable materials

●      Invisible under most clothing

●      Secures with durable and reliable hook and eye closures

●      Groin access so you can easily use the restroom without removing the corset

●      Reinforced abdominal panels

The Bellefit Postpartum Corset cons are few:

●      Only available in beige

●      The sizing isn’t the same as regular clothing sizing, so you may need to consult the sizing chart to ensure you get a great fit

●      You may need help putting it on the first time—putting on a corset when you have not worn one before does take a little practice

Take Care of Your Health and Yourself During Your Postpartum

Always check first with your healthcare provider to ensure you are cleared to wear a postpartum corset like Bellefit. Postpartum garments can deliver the compression you need to feel better and recover more quickly from your pregnancy. And don’t overlook the importance of a comfortable and supportive postpartum corset as your body heals. Take care of yourself and your health with the postpartum support you need by choosing the product that can deliver results.

If you have any questions about postpartum girdles or Bellefit, I’d be glad to help!

Marjorie Bohorquez

Marjorie is a mom of 2 and youtube influencer with her 5 year old son Sebastian and 3 year old daughter Astrid.

You can follow along with Marjorie here:

Youtube

Instagram

You Don’t Have to be a Stay at Home Mom to be a Good Mom

You don’t have to be a stay at home mom to be a good mom.

(And the photo of this couch relates to that, just give me a minute).

I’ve spent the past 5 years staying home with my kids. And to be honest, I haven’t enjoyed it.

This isn’t some sort of complaining post, so don’t come at me. My goal is for it to be hopeful for mamas in the thick of little bitties and the monotony of staying at home with them.

When I decided to be a stay at home mom, it made the most financial sense for our family of 3. Then we became a family of 4 and I didn’t see the sense in going back to work.

So I stuck it out at home. And I really, truly struggled. I tried really hard to be a mom that I’m not. I’ve been them all: the crafty mom, the educational mom, the home made every meal mom (this one was my shortest stint), the do all the activities mom, the keep the neighborhood kids mom.

I thought I needed to be the “perfect” mom. And I blame myself for that. I fell into the lies of society (and the patriarchy) that say you must be Carol Brady in order to be a good mom.

And that’s a complete load of crap in case you’ve made it this far.

Do I love my kids? Absolutely. Do I want to spend every single moment of my life with them? Hahahaha no.

My kids are in pre-K now. I have two days a week to myself. So I’m back to working a part-time, flexible schedule that still allows me to be Mom first.

And let me tell you - my mental health has never been better.

It took a lot of therapy and self discovery for me to realize that I can do motherhood my own way & still be a good mom. I can still be the mom my kids need and deserve AND be true to myself in the process.

So, back to the couch.

I bought a couch today. By myself.

Something I couldn’t have done 5 years ago as a stay at home mom.

And I felt like I was coming full circle.

I wouldn’t trade the 5 years I’ve had at home for anything. I’ve learned so much! About myself, my kids, my relationships, my faith, and my marriage.

Those 5 years were an immense blessing.

But they were also the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

So if you’re in the thick of mothering little babies at home, know that it doesn’t last forever. You will, one day, feel a bit more like yourself again.

You do not have to prescribe to all the motherhood lies the world throws your way.

Find your avenue of motherhood & own it.

(And if it includes a couch, even better I say!)

Hey Momma, You are not Failing, Our Culture is Failing You - Aubrey Vick

I am proud to have my friend - Aubrey Vick, MFT intern, therapist, and owner of Maryville Wellness Center - as a guest blogger this month.

Mamas, please read her insightful and gracious words.

---

Everyday women come into my office, sit on my couch and trust me with their innermost thoughts and fears. As a therapist who specializes in Perinatal Mental Health - most of those women are pregnant or postpartum. All of my clients are unique individuals who have completely different upbringings, life experiences and traumas, but after a while I started to realize that I was hearing much of the same material.

I had to ask myself the question- why?

Why do all of these Moms believe they are not good enough?
Why do all of these Moms feel like they are failing as Moms?
Why do so many of these Moms have similar birth traumas?
Why do all of these Moms struggle with self care?
Why do all of these Moms struggle with simple questions like: what are your hobbies? What do you like to do for fun?

This question really started to eat away at me.

Granted, I have a sample size that is biased- they are all women who are in the perinatal period and seeking therapy. I started to listen to Moms in general and as a Mom myself around the same age as most of my clients, I already found myself in conversations with plenty of other Moms. I found that I heard the same troubles outside of my office and this was not a phenomenon only occurring amongst Moms in therapy - this was affecting Moms in general.

The ones in therapy just happened to have the resources, support, privilege, etc. to be able to go to therapy. Once I had this realization the questions only grew - why are so many Moms experiencing the same feelings of unworthiness, exhaustion and existential confusion?

Most of the Moms who sit on my couch are burnt out, have no idea who they are, think they are failing and believe they are not good enough. Commonly the cherry on top is some sort of traumatic birth or baby related trauma experience, although this is not the case with everyone. As I started to zoom out and look at the way our culture treats Moms/Women the answer to all of my questions was simple:

Moms are not getting Motherhood wrong- we as a culture are completely failing Moms.

From the very top of our governmental systems down to the bottom person to person interactions- we are unequivocally failing Moms.

Before I give an example I want to mention that this example will be of a cisgender, white, middle class Mom. My intention is not to leave out anyone - my intention is to shine light on these issues reflected in the way I personally have experienced Motherhood and in the way most of my clients have. It is fair to say that Women of color, those with less socioeconomic privilege, and those within our transgender and LGBTQ+ communities experience our failure of Mothers at a much larger and more severe level.

Imagine this scenario: you are married and find out you are pregnant.

It was a planned pregnancy and your family and partner are supportive. At first the pregnancy goes very well but you experience some medical issues later on in the pregnancy which causes a lot of anxiety. You are told that your birth plan will no longer work and although the birth was medically a success - you are left feeling disempowered. You felt unheard and like you had no say in the way you experienced your birth into Motherhood; but when you expressed these emotions you were told by well meaning family and friends that the baby was healthy and that is all that really matters. Already, your mental health and experiences are being sacrificed and gaslit and you have not even left the hospital.

Once you are home you quickly realize that the 6 week paid leave your work has given you is not nearly enough. Your body is wrecked, and your partner has no paid leave, so as you try to recover from birthing a human being out of your body you are waking up every 2 hours. You hurt all over. You are exhausted and the little human you just met is very demanding. You do not feel warm and fuzzy like you thought you would- which makes you think that something is wrong with you. Why are you not connecting right away with your baby?

Your 6 week appointment comes and your doctor sees you for 5 minutes, just enough time to clear you for sex and send you on your way. Meanwhile, you are lugging your infant to their appointments every week or two, constantly stressing over their weight gain. Breastfeeding has been a disaster but all of the blogs you read up to this point say it is important, plus the ACOG just came out and said you breastfeed till 2 years old, so you wince and your nipples bleed and you tough it out.

As the day your maternity leave ends looms closer your anxiety heightens. How can you possibly go back to work? You can barely form coherent sentences. Yesterday, you almost brushed your teeth with diaper cream, how can you function in a fast paced work environment? Plus, securing childcare has been an absolute nightmare and you have not been able to find a reliable provider.

After many tears and talks with your partner you decide you have no choice but to quit. You figure you can go back once you get this whole being a Mom situation under control and once you can secure childcare. You try your hardest. You clean, you feed the baby, you cook, you change the baby, you read to the baby, you buy the brain challenging toys for the baby, you purée sweet potatoes once the baby is old enough and you do all of this on very little sleep. You tell yourself since your partner is the one who has to be at work he should sleep and not do night wakings. But as the days, then weeks, then months go by and you grow more and more exhausted - you start to feel bitter and resentful towards him.

Under that resentment is jealousy. Jealousy that he also just had a baby yet his sleep, his work, and his life seem to be almost exactly the same while your body has completely changed, you forgot what sleep was, you had to quit your job and your entire life now revolves around the nap schedule of someone who is 14 pounds.

Your entire existence and identity have shifted and you have no idea who you are.

As time goes on you are fueled by the idea that you are not doing enough. You could be homemaking all the baby food instead of just some. You could be better at sticking to all of the sleep schedules you have tried and that have failed, you could figure out a way for the baby to nap in their crib instead of on you, you could work out and fit into a smaller jean size if you just tried hard enough. Every time you scroll Instagram you get ads for weight loss programs but you do not have the energy to sign up. You are failing, and you have completely lost yourself. How do other Moms do it? Why can’t you be more like them? Why are you so bad at this?

These thoughts cause anxiety and/or depression until one day you cannot take it anymore and you call to make an appointment with a therapist and you land yourself on my couch.

If any of this resonates with you I will tell you what I tell my clients: this is not a you problem, this is an us problem. From the very beginning you embarked on this journey into Motherhood on a road that is full of gaping potholes and land mines. Our medical system is failing Mothers. Our political and governmental systems are failing Mothers. Our patriarchal views are failing Mothers. Our outdated ideas about what Women’s roles and bodies should look like are failing Mothers. Our baby-centered culture is failing Mothers.

You are not flawed, you are paying the price for our society’s flaws.

You are enough.
You are not a failure.
Your wants and desires matter.
You are worthy of love and care.
You matter.
You matter.
You matter.

Without someone to carry and birth human beings we as an entire world would crumble.

We would cease to exist. Yet we treat the people who take on the most important task of our existence like they are worthless. Instead of treating them with the reverence and tenderness they need in their most vulnerable time - we cast them aside the moment the baby is born. We gaslight them when they tell us how hard it is to care for an infant. We make them believe they must completely give up who they were before for Motherhood, and if they don’t they are labeled as selfish. Sometimes we expect them to drag themselves back into the workforce but still carry all of the invisible load of being the main parent.

After we unpack some of these truths together in my office, we start on a different path to Motherhood than the one laid out to us by our culture.

A path that is free of shame. A path that is gentler and kinder in its internal dialogue. A path that validates the identity shift and integrates who you were with who you are. A path that demands self care, that requires more help and support from partners, a path that requires less of you and that celebrates all of you.

Because you- in all of your beautiful glory, deserve celebration.

Instead you have been cast aside and made to believe your only worthiness is found when you measure up to our culture’s completely unrealistic and damaging expectations of you. Almost every single Mom comes into therapy and when I ask why they decided to start therapy now they say, “I want to be a better Mom to my baby because they deserve a Mom who (fill in the blank)”.

One of my first goals for my clients is to just help them merely see themself again. See themself as a human being who actually matters.

It is so hard for them to see themself in a culture and society that does not see them and who does not make policies that give any indication that they matter. If you have gotten this far and this resonates with you- just do one thing for me - find a mirror, stand in front of it, look into your eyes and tell yourself, “I see you, you are enough and you matter”.

Aubrey Vick is a MFT intern and holds her PMHC (perinatal mental health care) certificate. She has a passion for working with women in the perinatal period and owns a private practice in East Tennessee. Aubrey is a Mom of 3 and spends what little spare time she has with her husband and kids, playing tennis, hanging out on their family farm and coaching soccer.